The Top Ten Things To Learn In Spanish Class Before The Camino
10. I need batteries.
9. Ten bucks for a Gatorade!? Gimme a beer.
8. Has the mud ever been this deep?
7. I don’t shower with men.
6. No, I’m sitting here waiting for the ice cream truck.
5. I didn’t know people drank from this fountain. It sure looked like a foot-soak to me.
4. Do you have earplugs? The Italian guy in the next bunk is snoring.
3. Touch my boobs or butt [edited] again and I SWEAR I’ll slay you in the Name of Jesus.
2. That smell isn’t the pasture, it’s the socks dangling from my pack.
And the number one phrase to learn in Spanish:
1. Give me all the M&M’s in the store or your children will go blind and get leprosy.